i am a rollercoaster.......sometimes.....sometimes not

The weekend was amazing. Probably my best weekend here yet.

Friday was spent running errands, spending time with Cher, and dinner with the Brinkmans.

I will admit there was a moment of crabbiness in there when I locked my keys in my car before dinner. AAA came to my rescue. It was good to be around people.

Saturday was going to see Josiah in Cinderella. It was really fun. :) The afternoon was spent at an amazing BBQ place that must be revisited at some point, followed by ice cream and random fun adventures while walking through a Big Lots with Si. It was just nice to not have a schedule, be random, and not really care about anything. It was a really great day. I headed back home and ended up spending a good part of the evening running around with Cher.

Sunday came early as always. I played a song on the guitar during worship! That's a big step for me...and I think it actually went pretty well. I had things planned already for Sunday evening, so I spent the afternoon enjoying the fall weather and sitting at CUPZ. The evening was really fun. The youth worship team is doing really well, confirmation was a lot of fun, and youth group was random, but cool. :)

Yesterday, I felt so good about everything. I got so much accomplished in that day and I felt so productive.

I got up this morning and walked to work. I decided it'd be a great practice and I could pray as I walked. So as I went along, my heart just spoke "God, use me today. Just give me opportunities to be used and help me to accept them." I was just praying that over and over. This woman pulls up alongside me in a van. She yells out the window, "are you going to Risen Savior?" I didn't hear her. I assumed she was lost and needed directions. "Are you going to Risen Savior??" I replied, "yes." She offered me a ride, but I told her I was enjoying my morning stroll with such a beautiful day unfolding. She said okay and went on. Before I knew what had just happened, I realized that God had immediately given me an opportunity. I didn't take it. I was so sad and apologized to him for not taking an opportunity to get to know a mother from the school. As I walked, there's a section with no side walk (which also happens to contain lots of stickers). I was wearing flip flops and they were COVERED in stickers. I was in pain, so once through that little area, I had to stop and pick some of the deep ones out. I just realized though how faithful God is in providing for us. He wants to protect us and gives us opportunities. Most of the time we're oblivious or think our agenda is better. Wow. What a blatant lesson this morning. I put my agenda in front of people and it's a sticky place to be. Literally.

But really..

Today what I feel is lonely. Days like that are hard. I find myself rambling to people that I see, just because I so desperately want to talk with them and maybe be heard for a few moments.

I know God is working on me. It's just hard when it feels like it's just me out here without my normal encouragement, support, and friendship.

Please forgive excessive IM'ing, Facebooking, tweets, texts, and messages of all kinds. I don't mean to annoy, I'm just thirsty for connection with friends. Grant me grace.