Life is so flipping good.
God is so good. This whole relationship thing with Him is waay better than a legalistic set of guidelines from a character with a gavel. The Shack has given me such a different perspective about what it means to be in relationship with God. I'm not saying I agree with everything in the book, but to see what my relationship with God could look like is absolutely mind boggling. I'm almost done with the book!! More to come about that when I'm finished.
I've had a few situations as of late that had the potential to really be "day wreckers" if you will. Relationships always have the power to hugely impact my mood. I'm realizing more and more, however, that this relationship that I have with God is so much bigger than any other relationship that might disappoint. He just wants to simply be with me. He loves without pretense or agenda. It's overwhelming...this God wants to just spend time with me.
More on this later...confirmation and youth group must happen right now.
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My day/night at church is finally over. I've been in that building from 7am-8:45pm with only leaving for about 30 minutes after church to get lunch. Yikes.
Anyway, regardless of spending lots of time at church, I had an amazing day. I find that I've been opened up to how real a relationship with God can be and I simply beam at the thought of constantly being with Him. That relationship gives me satisfaction and just an indescribable bliss that comes with spending time with an old friend. :) I can't even fathom it. It's been such a break through in these last few days about what it means to be in relationship with God. I don't know. I'm baffled by it. It's awesome.
And I'm just amazed by the little things in life that we can overlook, but can bring a smile to our face if we think of them as little gifts from our pursing God. :) A great prayer by a youth, a goodie bag left on the door step from a neighbor, a word of encouragement, a Word that God speaks to my heart right where I'm at. :)
Today this verse was in my devotion!!
"My heart has heard you say, 'Come and talk with me.' And my heart responds, 'Lord, I am coming.'" Psalm 27:8
Wow. I'm blown away by that verse!! God is a lover of quality time...just like me! :) He invites me to come and chat. :) And I say..there's nothing I'd love more, Abba.
So, I always avoid the topic of romantic relationships because they are so foreign to me and frankly they often make me uncomfortable. I don't know what to do with them. I am getting better with that though. I'm growing. :) Buuut...all of the aforementioned things do not deter my desire to have one of these said relationships. I find myself being defeated over and over again in this area of life. Things are never what I think and I get disappointed time and time again. I get hit repeatedly with a message that I'm not wanted. That sounds worse than I mean. I know people want me...friends want me around...God wants me. I have self-esteem, I promise. I just mean in a plain, honest sort of way that no man currently wants to pursue my heart or feels that it is worthy of doing so. This was a realization that was brought up once again yesterday. It could've brought me down like it has before...but no. It didn't.
There's just this something. This something about being so satisfied. Honestly so satisfied with this relationship that I'm diving into with Jesus. Yes, I still want to find that special guy...as difficult and awkward as it is for me to admit...but I am so good with who God is in me. I'm so content with the fact that He is enough, all I need, and is always pursuing my heart. :)
Thanks, Jesus. I really am grateful. Thanks for your love.
Have a great week, everyone. :)
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